


you should come with a warning

by ViolaWay



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Internal Monologue, M/M, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-10
Updated: 2013-07-10
Packaged: 2017-12-18 08:47:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/877907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ViolaWay/pseuds/ViolaWay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John thinks about what it's like being Sherlock's boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	you should come with a warning

You Should Come With A Warning

Every night, John goes to sleep thinking that when he wakes up, Sherlock will no longer be beside him. It’s leftover terror from seeing the dead body of the only man he’s ever loved, he supposes, but that doesn’t reduce the horror that he feels whenever he closes his eyes.

 

Every morning, Sherlock is there. He looks peaceful in sleep, tousled hair and lips parted with the air whistling through them, curling into John’s side. The light breaks through the curtains, and John realizes that he is afraid of that, too. That when the sun comes up, Sherlock will change. His demeanor will be so much colder, and he won’t admit to any reliance he might have on John, not in the harsh, stark daylight.

 

He would never have expected this, after meeting Sherlock or before. And for all the suggestive comments and sniggering, no one’s told him how exactly how to deal with this. Being in a relationship with the most difficult man in all of England. They should make a pamphlet or something.

 

They probably would, if anyone actually knew how to deal with Sherlock better than John does.

 

It’s worth it, though, he sometimes forget to say. Sherlock’s hard to deal with—impossible, even—but John’s in love with him. He always has been, even if he denied it to everyone (most of all himself). Sherlock’s a bit like a mythical creature: gorgeous, luring in its prey, and then consuming them. John thinks he doesn’t mind (and Sherlock’s a five-year-old at heart, which is where the analogy of the seductive tempter falls a bit short).

 

When they first discussed this, whatever it is, _them,_ Sherlock had said: “I’m sorry that I can’t live up to everything you expect from me.”

 

It’s true enough. At the time, John had fervently denied any such thing, but it’s true, and he’s figuring out that it doesn’t matter. Sherlock is so uniquely himself that any change—whether for John’s benefit or not—seems unnecessary and regrettable. Sherlock has made himself so vulnerable already on the behalf of their relationship, and John knows that he can’t expect Sherlock to give up any more. Not when he already gave his life (sort of).

 

Sometimes it makes John sad, though. The emotional distance is wearing, even though it is nonexistent. It’s just not constantly reaffirmed, and John indulges in paranoia too often to be healthy. He doesn’t want to smother Sherlock, though, when the man is so unused to putting his feelings on the line.

 

He’s confused; he’s constantly on his toes and unable to anticipate what will happen next. Sometimes he minds and sometimes he doesn’t. But one thing is for certain: he refuses to leave Sherlock, no matter what. The love he feels for the man is once in a lifetime, fairytale stuff, and he’ll never let go of it.

**Author's Note:**

> This fanfic is very obviously based on a sort of obscure song. I'll give you invisible cookies if you can tell me what song it is in the comments :D  
> Leave kudos' too pleaseeeee :3


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